Wednesday, September 25, 2013

love?

It's funny with guys like me,love is something I laugh at. Perhaps not knowing unconditional love like a mother's love make me cynical.I saw a glimpse of that unconditional love once and i yearn for it but I don't think I will come across it again. To me love is to poke fun at, to laugh at the stupidity of men that need a companion for one should love at themselves to find love.Yet it is not that easy. I am drawn to people who search for love, who yearn companion,I found them interesting, something beguiling, something i need to explore and get myself into trouble all the time.I send a sort of a stanza, a malay stanza which comes to me and as a amateur writer i wrote it down. I send it to 3 girls i know, 2 knows me well. I started with mistakes here and there and end which i believe completion of my thoughts. I print below all 3

People ask me do you really love Jah or are you being you. English is very definite in her words. It define things in black and white no greys but love is subjective so I will use Malay to describe how I feel.
“ Cinta itu hanya bisa berputik jika dua insan bersatu, rasanya aman penuh kehangatan. Kasih Sayang itu ujud diantara kalian manusia yang mengenali satu sama lain tidak semestinya cinta kerana dia lebih luhur dan lebih kental tidak ganjak dim amah usia. Ya, aku kasih dan saying sama Jah, kerana bagiku dia merupakan cewek yang ideal,sempurna buat ku. Dia perlengkap ku, Dia mengakhiri  hidupku memenuhi ia dengan penuh nekmat.Dia merupakan bidadari yang kutunggu yang dijanjikan kepada Tuhan kepada setiap insannya.
Aku terhutang budi keapda Hoya Deen dan Bu Carol dan tidak lupa anak Chloe yang telah memberiku peluang medapat no pulsar Si Khatijah Ummi hatiku, jantungku dan hidupku. Dengan bantuan mereka diharapkan cinta dapat berputik dan berbunga disemai dengan kata kata indah. Aku berjanji padamu Sahabatku bahawa hingga akhir hayatku hanya ada Jah di mataku di lunuk hatiku.”

People ask me do you really love Dina or are you being you. English is very definite in her words. It define things in black and white no greys but love is subjective so I will use Malay to describe how I feel.
“ Cinta itu hanya bisa berputik jika dua insan bersatu, rasanya aman penuh kehangatan. Kasih Sayang itu ujud diantara kalian manusia yang mengenali satu sama lain tidak semestinya cinta kerana dia lebih luhur dan lebih kental tidak ganjak dimamah usia. Ya, aku kasih dan saying sama Ku Dina, kerana bagiku dia merupakan cewek yang ideal,sempurna buat ku. Dia perlengkap ku, Dia mengakhiri  hidupku memenuhi ia dengan penuh nekmat.Dia merupakan bidadari yang kutunggu yang dijanjikan kepada Tuhan kepada setiap insannya.
Aku terhutang budi keapda mu Ku Hanafiah dan AlmarhumTengku Ahmad Adzlan yang telah memberiku peluang medapat no pulsar Ku Dina Ummi hatiku, jantungku dan hidupku. Dengan bantuan mereka diharapkan cinta dapat berputik dan berbunga disemai dengan kata kata indah. Aku berjanji padamu Sahabatku bahawa hingga akhir hayatku hanya ada Dina di mataku di lubuk hatiku.”
 
People ask me do you really love Linda or are you being you. English is very definite in her words. It define things in black and white no greys but love is subjective so I will use Malay to describe how I feel.
“ Cinta itu hanya bisa berputik jika dua insan bersatu, rasanya aman penuh kehangatan. Kasih Sayang itu ujud diantara kalian manusia yang mengenali satu sama lain tidak semestinya cinta kerana dia lebih luhur dan lebih kental tidak ganjak dimamah usia. Ya, aku kasih dan sayang sama Linda, kerana bagiku dia merupakan cewek yang ideal,sempurna buat ku. Dia perlengkap ku, Dia mengakhiri  hidupku memenuhi ia dengan penuh nekmat.Dia merupakan bidadari yang kutunggu yang dijanjikan kepada Tuhan kepada setiap insannya.
Aku berterimakasih pada yang maha Esa kerana memberi peluang bagi Linda Ummi hatiku, jantungku dan hidupku. Walaupun kusedar cinta tidak dapat berputik dan berbunga disemai dengan kata kata indah. Aku berjanji pada disisa sisa hidup hayat ku bahawa hingga akhir nyawaku dicabut oleh malaikat israfil hanya ada Linda di mataku di lubuk hatiku.”

The reaction of them 3 is different. Night and day. The first one acted indifferently. I knew her since she was 8 and l knew all her siblings in fact her brother is my very good friend. She was nonchalant about it although in private she is please as a punch after all women are vain.

The second one,as expected degenerates me. Putting that in her facebook for all her friends to read. Some I heard were very spiteful as i told my friends I do not know them and as for me these will die down in 3 months max 6 months and the issue will die a normal death. She even ask her hubby so she says to write to me I have not open yet.

The third one pleases me. She, instead of being angry wails what do I want and why do i write it? She is one of those who likes me but I only knew of it when I left college. I confess that I like her too but her reaction caught me off guard, then.I wish very much i have acted sooner. She wears a hijab, a good muslimah indeed. It isfated so i send her those words because it would last forever!

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